Summer “Mode” (brain now switching to STANDBY mode)

(it’s almost always summer mode around here…)

The Hermosa Beach Summer Sunset Concert Series

Now that Memorial Day weekend, the traditional start of summer, has come and gone, I’m easing myself into “Summer” mode. Summer, the season lasting from June 20th (at 4:09 PST – ¬†which is the Summer Solstice, if you are a member of the Druid faith) to September 22nd (at 7:49 a.m.), actually doesn’t begin for three weeks, but I’m already feeling that inner personal pressure from deep inside the brain to try to get NOTHING done.

“Why, Tim? Why are you turning off your brain now that the days are longer and warmer and the nights shorter?” you ask. Well, thanks for asking. I know most of you readers (few as you are) would miss me if I actually turned my brain all the way off for 3 months. So, just to allay your fears, I am NOT going to totally turn off my brain. I’m just going to put it on the back burner so speak. How could I pass on blogging about politics, “Cold Void,” summer TV, the decay of society, my job hunting prospects and other “off topics?”

We’re “Programmed” to take Summer “off”

What it comes down to is that I’ve been programmed to take the summers off by my ancestors. Thanks, mom and dad! You see, in the “olden times” in the U.S., kids went to school after the growing season was done in the Fall. The school year lasted all Winter (walking 50 miles! In bare feet! Every day!) into Spring and then took the entire Summer off to work in the fields and farms. The only field I worked in during summer was my backyard growing up, throwing crab apples at other kids in epic, cross-neighborhood, running battles until someone caught one in the eye or tempers flared with the heat. There were the 4-week growing seasons where I DID work at Doehne’s Strawberry Farm (Michigan’s BIGGEST U-Pick Strawberry Farm!!!), but mostly my summers were spent devoid of any learning or productivity. At least I played outside most of the time, unlike kids today…

By the time I returned to grade school the following Fall, after slaving away all Summer softening my brain, I would have trouble spelling the word “the.” No lie! I actually spent five minutes in Mrs. Marlette’s class in 3rd grade one September trying to figure out the word “the.” This and the fact that the band director, after my tryout for an instrument, told me to “never play an instrument,” led me into a spiral of self-doubt that plagues me to this day. (Thank God I turned out pretty good-looking and could f*cking care less what people think…) The lesson to be learned here are:

1. Parents – home school your children! Unless, you know, you’re not really that smart and/or you’re just going to teach them Intelligent Design and that Adam and Eve rod on dinosaurs and that science is dangerous. Nevermind, forget this idea. We’ve seen how certain states have (ahem) “benefitted” from this approach.

2. But, kids should be taught year round. It’s great preparation for the soul-crushing reality of life once you graduate from high school: yes, kids, you’re not going to get that WHOLE summer off anymore. Welcome to the real world.

Summer as an adult is NOT summer as a kid

After graduation from high school and needing a job to pay for things when not hitting the books (hahahaha) at the University of Wisconsin, I realized my summers no long existed as they once did. Throughout my professional life, they have never existed. You see, I actually worked each summer. Usually inside a mall, selling shitty men’s clothes to other “professionals.” I saw the beautiful glare of the sunset only as I stared out the doors to the store while standing under the harsh fluorescents. I missed out on deep, even tans and daytime activities that my friends did such as drinking and canoeing, or drinking and fishing, or drinking. Maybe it was a good thing to have a job each summer… Clearly, summer is only for kids. And I am not one.

What the hell, who cares?

As Calvin and Hobbes once said, "The Days are just packed."

Yet, I am still going to pretend like I am a kid again and enjoy my summer. Now that I am back to “amateur status” (aka NO JOB), I am going to go to the beach more often. I already got back on the volleyball court last weekend. Of course, I am still paying physically for that, but it’s Summer; nothing a beer or 12 won’t cure…

Maybe I’ll find a few $20’s in a book on my shelf and I can go golf…

Some days, I’ll just do nothing at all…

I’m going to do some exploring around Southern California. I’ll take little 100 mile road trips and write articles. Maybe I’ll spin this into a travel writing gig…

Maybe I’ll even look for a girlfriend…

(Summer is the best time to find a girlfriend, in my opinion. When you meet your soon-to-be-girlfriend at the beach, you already know what your getting. It’s not like meeting her in the winter and you realize she really wasn’t wearing four sweaters. But, finding a girlfriend during the summer is great because you can easily build a relationship without all those pesky holidays, and plans surrounding them, intruding on establishing something. PLUS, my birthday is in September, just enough time for this mythical woman to learn enough about me to get me a cool present!)

Yes, I think that this summer is going to be fun. Unless, that is I return to “pro” status and get a job… (sigh)

Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Stumble Upon Share this page via Digg this Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Leave a Reply